Songs From Your Ex Girlfriend

Now that it is summer time, iced tea is back in full force. There is however a problem. No place serves good iced tea! When dining out, most are faced with iced tea from a soda dispensing machine or the like. McDonalds does happen to have good sweet tea, but any other place you must add sugar after it is served to you. Problem? Sugar does not dilute well in cold liquids making for a gritty and not so wonderful tasting drink.

There are 2 good ways to make iced tea at home with little trouble. First, is the good old sun tea. Pick up a sun tea container at your local walmart or target, some sugar, and a box of tea bags. I prefer Lipton with lemon and honey, or just with lemon. Put about 10-15 tea bags in the container. 15 will make some super strong tea. I like 10-12 depending on how much time I have to make it. The more tea bags will also enable it to brew in a shorter period of time. So if you only let it soak in the sun for a couple hours, the more the better, but if it is an all day haul, 10 should do. Put the bags in the container and put in the sun where you know it will get sunlight all day. Do not put the sugar in before you put it out in the sun. After a few hours, at least 4 if you have the time, take it back inside. The tea should be hot from the sun. Now add one to one and a half cups of sugar, mix and put in the fridge. If you want to have a nice cup right away, fill a cup with ice and enjoy!

If like me, you are pressed for time though, here is a solution. Brew a full pot of water thru your coffee pot. Just fill the back part of the maker with water and hit start so that hot water dispenses. Take a normal 2 quart pitcher and put 10 tea bags and one cup of sugar in it. When the hot water is done brewing, pour into pitcher over tea bags and sugar. Mix well and throw some ice in. Fill a cup of ice and enjoy! Perfect sweet tea in under 5 minutes!

I have added a page called “lyrics” to the site. To get to it, click either the top right hand corner, or the link on the right navigation bar. The lyrics are all by me, and I decided to publish them because I am never going to have the time in the world to do more than write them. Please be respectful of copyright. If you like any of the lyrics, just comment or email me @ admin@songsfromyourexgirlfriend.com and we can work something out. Enjoy!

As if Myspace.com was not already slow already. As if Myspace was not over done and too glittery already…I have now witnessed the most awful redo of a website in my entire life.

Upon logging on…or trying to log on to myspace, there is a movie clip playing on the front page. More graphics, more pictures, more links. I type in my user name and password…i sit, I wait…I sit and wait some more. Website crashes…try again..crashes again…over and over. In two hours I have been able to login once.

Does myspace not realize that most people have computers that cannot handle the overload of what I call website bs? When I want to stay in touch with my friends and family, I do not want to see pretty pictures or movie trailers. Even on the faster computer in the house…still no go. What about people on dial up? I am lucky to have a blazing quick cable modem with speeds around 11 to 15, but most people do not have anywhere near that. On dial up one would probably be waiting 24 hours to get logged in.

I am not going to make this a log rant. I tried to contact customer support for myspace, but guess what? I cannot even get to that. All I will say is that I understand advertisement pays for myspace. But while they are raking in the dough from the advertising they run, people…people with good computers and good internet connections even are not currently able to use myspace. Good job myspace, I am happy to say that while you are making money, people cannot even use your site or click on the ads because its too darn slow. I am sure the people who pay you will be thrilled to know that this was the worst website unleashing in history and maybe someone will be smart and pull advertising knowing that even high end users are having trouble navigating the website.

Here is a tip-

When the person you are with is going through some issues in their life such as medical problems, financial problems, work related problems, or any other stress, it is best to be supportive.

Everyone gets caught up in their own wants and needs…which is perfectly acceptable on many levels. On the flip side of things though, if something negative is happening to someone you love, people do not like to be kicked when they are down.

Life might get unfair at times, but if the relationship is strong, two people will work through it. I am not one to preach, but it is easy to love when things are great, and easy to run when things are bad. The bad things however are what makes us stronger, not just in a relationship, but as people in general.

In other news, ever been in a Wal-Mart with no power? It brings a different light (no pun intended) to the store. No lights also caused from funnel cloud in the sky and bad thunderstorm. I guess a normal day would just be; well boring.

I am ready for the early summer eastern heat wave to be over with now. A trip to walmart and three fans later, relief is still not in sight. Blame me for renting a house which has barely any windows, and those I do have crank out horizontally, so not even a casement window AC will fit. I have one window that can have a casement AC, but no 400.00 dollars for the casement window AC. Such tragedy.

I went to the doctor today for some issues I have been having. My previous doctor in this field I went to for over 10 years, but alas, a 6 hour commute back to that doctor is not economical, so a new doctor I had to find. Lets just say I am not happy. For the first time in history I actually yelled during an office visit and frankly did not care. I am actually still do angry, I think a letter to the head of the practice might also be a good idea. Every time I answered a question, I was cut off. Every time I tried to explain something, I was cut off. Apparently in the medical world, there is a difference between a lump and a bump and god forbid I called my bump a lump. Honestly, I should have got up, told them to take my 25 dollar co payment and shove it you know where and left. After my letter is written, I think another change in doctors is in order.

After my rant at the doctor, I headed to walmart to purchase a few fans for the sweltering place I call home. 130.00 later, I walked out with 3 fans, a blow up pool for the kids, a package of socks, and a pump to blow up the pool. So much for always low prices. It was 98 degrees when I left walmart, and was pondering why the store was so busy.

Drove home expecting to get my stimulus check in the mail today, but no such luck. Hopefully tomorrow.

It amazes me how much times have changed. When I was a child, most women still stayed home and took care of the kids while the husbands worked long days. I think my mom gets confused when I talk to her these days, as she cannot understand how I “handle” everything.

Some would say I have a little bit of everything and a lot of nothing. I do not view it that way at all. I view it, as if I am capable of doing everything, so why not do it? I work full time, I go to college full time, I have two wonderful toddlers, am married to a great guy, pay the bills, network, drive back and forth to work everyday etc. I am however, in need of a vacation.

That is all I need. Every few months, I like to take a few days and just go somewhere. I have not done this in a very long time, which is probably why I have been feeling the strain of things a lot more lately than I have been.

I also need to cut back on my caffeine intake. The amount of coffee and soda I consume in a day should probably be illegal. The ironic part, is that I really do not feel I benefit from it anymore. I do not get any jolts from it, and it does not wake me up, no matter the amount I consume. On the other hand though, if I do not drink caffeine, the headaches I get do get worse!

A lot of personal things have crawled their way in here lately, which I prefer not to do. However, I must go on a sort of rant about something that has been bothering me lately.

I am the type of person where I can usually find something I like about everyone. I am not the life of the party by any means, but I make conversation easy, and I can usually pick up multiple qualities I like about someone after getting to know them for a couple hours.

There are people you meet in life where you have a conversation with them and everything that is spoken by that person seems off. In a blunt fashion, the words coming out of their mouth are about as true as a sunny forecast when it’s pouring rain outside. The sugar coaters…the people who tell everyone what they want to hear so they can gain something from the situation.

Some call it naive when people believe what people say. However, some are naive, but some like me, give people the benefit of the doubt. It’s like being a teenager and telling your parents you are staying over at a friends house when you really have a hot date, and they are giving you the “benefit of the doubt”. They know you are lying, but they would rather believe you are honest and true, then believe their child is dishonest.

I am a believer that there is good in all people. So when I meet someone, find the good in them, and it ends up being untrue, I feel disappointment. Recently, I ran into a situation, where I was in conversation with a person who claimed they were frustrated with people spreading rumors about them which were not true, and that people were labeling this person things that the person also claimed to be untrue. To fast forward a long story, the rumors were true. My ponder, is why would someone waste energy trying to convince someone they barely know something that is not true? It just seems to me, that if people in life were spending as much time helping other people in the world as they were taking making themselves look good, it would solve a lot of things!

There are some things in life that are hard for a person to get past. A person goes to war, and comes home and hits the deck at the sound of a popping noise or a loud bang. A woman who has been raped will typically choose not to walk alone in a dark alley. A person who had a bad car accident does not like to drive, or is jumpy when driving. A person who had abusive parents sometimes has difficulty being in relationships. There are just some things in life that causes a person to have a harsh reaction to certain things, people, or situations that they would not normally have if whatever hurt them did not ever happen. That is a typical human reaction. When one is hurt, they try and avoid the same thing that hurt them the first time, or any memory associated with that hurt, emotional upset, tragic event etc.

But what happens when a person keeps getting put in the same position? What happens when memories keep returning because a person is faced with what caused the pain to start with on a regular basis?

The divorce rate is probably over 50 percent by now. I have come to the conclusion that maybe part of this high increase is due to lack of respect. Marriage is sacred and intimate. Marriage is not an area for interference. People make mistakes, as no one is perfect, but when it is the same mistake over and over again, the person on the receiving end of the pain has to at some point start questioning the sanity of why the door keeps opening to let that pain back in. At one point does one realize that chances are, the battle is never going to be won, so to live without the pain means living without the love. Because what is love?

Love is devotion, support, trust, consideration, sensitivity, understanding, passion, honesty, and being able to believe in someone. A few weeks ago, I was watching the movie Dan in Real Life. To be honest, I did not care for the movie as much as I thought I would. It had a few interesting moments, but they were few, far and in between, and nothing really held too much of my attention. However, there was one line in the movie that has been sticking with me, as I believe it is very true. “Love is not a feeling, its an ability.” I have never heard a more true statement in my life. In order to love someone, you have to be able to love them, and they have to be able to let themselves be loved. If one of those components is missing, there is little hope for that love to be never ending. In order to have the ability to love, there has to be trust and honesty, and an openness. A relationship or any situation for that matter that does not have full openness is set up for failure. If you love someone, everything has to be out in the open. If there is anything in the closet, the person who loves you, is not loving you for you, they are loving you for who they think you are, or at least who they want you to be, or in this case, hope you can be.

Then there is respect. Every person has feelings, some of which are worth hurting more than others. I am not saying it is ever ok to hurt anyone, but after knowing someone for so long and providing for them in some way or another, there is an unspoken respect that should be there. There are just some things you do not do to people you love, and if you do make those mistakes, then it should not be a repetitive mistake. Once you see someone’s heart fall to pieces once, why open that door again?

There are many hopes and dreams. There are many wants and needs. One of those rises above all though, and that is love, and the love for a person who has been fought so hard for. If all of the battles that I have fought have been for nothing, then let me lose the war now and at least go out with my dignity, or what little I have left. Some things are better left in the past, some people are better left in the past.

If you know that your presence is interfering with love of two people, have the decency and give the room which is needed so at least one more marriage might not become just another number in this statistical world.

I had to have dropped my super nintendo 8948529023094584 times as a child. It got kicked, thrown, chewed on by the dog, spilled on, and it probably got electrocuted once or twice. My point? It still works.

I guess this can probably just go outside of the realm of video game systems, as a I have a CRT with 9 billion lives as well. Things just do not work like they used to, but prices of these handy gadgets keep going up. Yes, I would love a smart phone, so that maybe one day I can master the challenge of text messaging but why pay when it will break? I have actually not purchased, nor will I purchase the elaborate, up to date, killer graphics video game systems because like the phone, they will also break.

Let’s start way back. The family tv at my parents house until about 5 years ago was a circa 1970’s something RCA floor tv. It was bought used in 1981, the year I was born, and it did not bite the dust until 2003 I believe. It has since been replaced with not one, but two tv’s over the past 5 years since its death. Then we have my super nintendo phenomenon. My first cell phone..cheap as all hell, but it worked and it still works if I needed a replacement for one of the many more expensive phones that have not lived long at all.

What really gets me on this rant is my computer. To be nice to it, it is frankly possessed. For those who are in disbelief, I have the photos to prove it. I have a Dell E 1705 laptop with an Intel Duo Core Processor (1.66 GHz), and what I thought was the best graphics card for my system at the time, a Nvidia GeForce Go 7900 GS. Now of course this was not the best card available at the time, but when building a computer on Dell’s website, this is what they were offering as the top of the line laptop graphics card, and was also what came in that current generation XPS, so I figured I could not go wrong. Over the past couple of years, I have learned more than I want to, or probably need to due to the computer in question, but that is besides the point.

We will start with the small issues. First, the keys on the keyboard only seem to be hovering over the keyboard, since they pop off by slightly blowing on them, or at least it seems that way. If they are not popping off all over the place, they are stuck together, or just keep becoming unset. Yes, I am a hard typer..ok I frankly beat the crap out of the keyboard, but I have a defense. This computer will be 2 years old in July 08, and I am running my second battery, which is on its way out after only 10 months, after the first battery went in less than a year. And the greatest mystery. One day, for a reason which is yet to be unknown, my graphics became corrupted. I have done everything possibly to try and fix it from reinstalling, to patches, fixes, updates, driver reinstalls, roll backs, and you know what fixed it? I accidentally dropped it. Ok, well at least it got fixed right? Nope, 3 days later it went bad on me again, and it depends on the day on whether or not my graphics want to work or not. Currently I am running standard VGA graphics and have my NVIDIA card turned off, as when I turn it on, the only way to use the computer is in safe mode with networking.

Previous computer- Dell 5150, which I paid about 400.00 less for, has integrated ATI graphics, single core processor, and yes it still works fine. That battery lasted all most 2 years, which is the standard. Replacement battery is going on a year as we speak. All told, I probably would have saved myself a good 5 grand if I just would have hung on to the old stuff that actually works.

A conversation I had today made me think of some things. The conversation entailed that once we get older, dating gets harder. This seems to be the general opinion between people, and while on the surface it makes sense, I see a different perspective of things.

When diving into the subject, the reasons why it gets harder are pretty much the same between people. The biggest ones are money, (the older a person gets, the more they feel they have to be financially set in order to be involved with anyone on a serious basis). Work- “I’m too busy to have a relationship”. Or “my career takes too much of my time”. Baggage…the older we get, the more baggage we have. Ex husbands and wives, ex relationships, children, emotional stresses, money problems etc.

Which brings me to the post title. Many people say that dating and relationships were much easier when they were younger. I think back to being 21 for example. I was young(er), had lots of energy, and it seemed as though I had all the time in the world. Money never seemed to be a concern, nor did much of anything else for that matter. The fact is though, is that my life is not that much different now…except, I think as we get older, we become more picky. At 21, there was no rush to settle down, no rush to make a lot of money, no rush to find the perfect person for me. But now at all most 27, I have two kids, I have grown up, and lets face it, become more responsible. And while I might have to do the same things now as I did when I was 21, I was only responsible for myself.